Sunday…. Day out with the girls, good music, rum and great company. But there are always some men who ruin it!  So I have a large chest. A chest that warrants those to stare and sometimes pass comment. Over the years I’ve tolerated it because it’s obvious they are there and can look impressive in the right bra.  However I get so annoyed when it goes beyond that and I then become a object of some drunken perverts affection.  He said you have big tits. No shit Sherlock….. You are sexy… Grabs my arm. Tries to dance with me. I politely tell him ‘ I don’t like dancing with guys when I’m out, I’m here with my friends’. However I put it down to him being drunk. So I continue to talk to him and his friend at the bar. But by talking to him must have meant let’s have sex or I’m interested in u.Mate I’m not interested in u that way.  He then proceeded to slap my bum. Pull at my arm. Would not take no for an answer, no matter how politely I say it. Well I’m feisty, quick witted and most definitely mouthy. So I felt I could handle his archaic ideas of flirting. But my worry is that not all women could. Not all women would feel safe in that situation.  I found myself thinking if I had worn a different outfit then would that have made a difference.  However on reflection, I realised that I can go out in what the hell I like. Dress how I want. I can Talk to men when I want and none of this is a cue for me wanting them. None of this is a sign that we should ‘get it on’  The real issue is with consent and respect that so many men have not mastered! I have a say who touches me. I can say no n totally mean it. I can be friends and not want u in anyway! I can laugh n joke and that doesn’t mean u can take that as a sign for anything else.  If u are not sure air on side of caution. If u are not sure ask with the same brazen attitude u asked my bra size.  Be a gentleman….. Ladies never feel uncomfortable in yourselves. Never be scared to be sexy. Never be scared to put on something u like to wear because a man may get the wrong idea!  Decent bra…..proper knickers, you can’t go wrong.  Men or boys should I say… U won’t be seeing my bra or knickers with that damn attitude.  Peace 🙌🏾🙌🏾

The ‘inviting outfit’

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